James

Misdiagnosis and joining the dots

Posted on June 20, 2020January 5, 2022 by James

Misdiagnosis has meant me missing out on loving life, my whole life

Six things BipolarMe wants you to know

Posted on June 7, 2020April 16, 2021 by James

Bless me father for I haven’t written in 3 weeks. You’ll be strong, also. While you’re nursing your feels here are five things I wish people without bipolar knew about bipolar bears: 1. Stop walking on egg-shells. We’re tougher than you think. We’d far rather you played open open cards and told us the truth […]

Making the most out of your psychiatrist appointment

Posted on May 17, 2020April 16, 2021 by James

I’ve got my regular appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow. For the most part these sessions are productive and a great opportunity to better understand my bipolar diagnosis. I’m truly grateful that I’m in a position to have monthly appointments with my practitioner – not everyone is so lucky. Having regular appointments is almost like a […]

“Think and wonder, wonder and think.” Or shut up, tool.

Posted on May 10, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

Tell that to me when I’m on a roll and soon heads will. The human mind is a complex beast. Our understanding of it is minimal and usually when the neurologists says they understand something what they really mean is that that they can measure something against a hypothesis. It’s not often that science is […]

Why the lock down has me coping better than usual (work edition).

Posted on April 25, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

This lock-down has not had the effect I thought it would. For the most part I’ve been coping well, very well even. Psychiatrist agrees he’s never seen me better and can also say the same for many of his other patients. Of course this got me thinking: why have many bipolar folk and others with […]

Mindfulness and Awareness Locked Down

Posted on April 4, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

I don’t want to jinx it but my first week in full lock-down has been one of the most pleasant I’ve had in a long while. Certainly there were moments when I could feel rising irritations: usually spurred on by the riff-raff, alarmist, cabal of misinformation fearmongers on social media an inane WhatsApp groups. Somehow […]

Pick your Bipolar Rage

Posted on March 30, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

Recently I found myself in a desperate spiral of of unadulterated, uncontrollable rage that brought me to the brink of what I’ll call ‘manic disillusionment on the brink curtain fall’. I suspect this will be a very long post – I’m not sorry. It’s worth understanding the context of my most recent manic episode: this […]

Bioplar during the Coronavirus

Posted on March 18, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

I promised myself I wouldn’t do one of these posts. But here we are. I’ll keep it short though: Contact your pharmacy and fill the remaining repeats of your medication and if you have no more repeats ask for a new script with repeats from your psychiatrist. Social distancing doesn’t mean total isolation from the […]

On Bipolar Depression

Posted on March 15, 2020April 16, 2021 by James

I knew this day would come: writing about bipolar depression during bipolar depression. Everything is hard. That’s it. That’s all I have. Tomorrow will be better.

How to piss off bipolar bear – a guide.

Posted on March 14, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

A classic bipolar symptom: irritability. Or is it? The muggles are already at, “blah, blah, blah… we all get irritated” and that’s irritating AF. It you just took the time to READ up, just a little, about what irritability is to bipolar bears and the consequences then maybe you’ll get. what. a. fucking. big. deal. […]

Hypomania isn’t always a shitshow

Posted on March 11, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

You’d be forgiven for concluding that I have a pretty jaundiced view of hypomania. I mean I’ve written a great deal about the wrecking ball that is hypomania on all your relationships – from work to play. It’s not all bad though. I say that with a caveat though: it’s not all that bad if […]

Rapid-Cycling and The Luna[r]tic

Posted on March 10, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

I’ve written before about rapid cycling. I was rapid cycling that time if that wasn’t obvious enough from my writing style. I also wrote something similar here. I figured I’d put together something describing to muggles a comparable experience of rapid-cycling (not bicycle related). And some of the possible triggers (only two). The DSM-IV describes […]

Things I wish other BP people knew

Posted on March 1, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

Retrospect is 20/20. I’ve been living with varying degrees of bipolar for as long as I can remember (I’ll chat about the first ‘incidents’ some-other time).

Makes some notes: everyone has a rhythm.

Posted on February 25, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

It’s 00:24. He’s well aware that he should be in bed. That seems like such a waste of time. After all, he could be writing a novel, his next best app, a new and brilliant way of increasing engagement on the learning platform he’s come to call his craft. Sleep? No, not for him. Speaking […]

[Part 2] Disclosing your Bipolar Disorder

Posted on February 24, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

To tell or not to tell, that can be the big question with bipolar disorder. It’s your choice. There’s still a stigma surrounding mental illness, so you may want to be less open about it. You really don’t need to tell anyone at work about your bipolar disorder. But in certain circumstances, it can be […]

[Part 1] Disclosing your Bipolar Disorder

Posted on February 24, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

First up: the decision to share or divulge an illness with anyone is yours, and your choice alone to make. Now I can only really speak for my own ‘coming out’ story: on the one hand telling the world of my HIV status (yes, I was hypo-manic at the time also, no I don’t want […]

The whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Posted on February 22, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

In confronting my Bipolar disorder I’ve faced significant criticism that doing so has exposed family, friends and colleagues to prejudice and unwelcome questions and stigma related to my “coming out” with various ‘social deviancy’: gay, HIV+ and bipolar) which, in turn, has raised awkward and uncomfortable conversations with their and friends and colleagues.

Trigger happy Bipolar (Hypo)mania: what to avoid.

Posted on February 21, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

Look, there’s definitely some correlation between the frequency and severity of manic episodes related to environmental stimuli. In this posy I postulate some of the things I feel contribute to triggering (hypo)manic episodes and, in some instances, suggest ways to avoid them.

ICD-10’s diagnostic guidelines.

Posted on February 21, 2020 by James

As much as I hate being “labeled” anything I have to admit that putting a name to my behavior and symptoms over decades of going undiagnosed was a great comfort. It helps to know that there are others out there that are in the same boat as me, and how many.

(Ultra) Rapid-cycling BP: not a post about spinning.

Posted on February 21, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

[I came back and read thins and it’s all a lot of baloney. I think I was confusing rapid-cycling with mixed episodes…] Run-of-the-mill Bipolar Disorder (BP) is a cycle between usually extreme moods that typically last for a couple of weeks or months and, for the very unfortunate, years. The good news is that BP […]

This one time my world fell apart

Posted on February 17, 2020April 16, 2021 by James

The following post contains triggers related to suicide and self harm. If either of these makes you uncomfortable or trigger unpleasant emotional responses you should stop reading right now.

The prequel to mania is fucking terrifying

Posted on February 14, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

Turns out it’s much easier to write from experience, so I’m gonna stick with speaking from the heart. Sorry mom. Overshare, probably (see symptoms)… might delete later. My bipolar diagnosis has, in many respects, been life changing. For the most part in the good sense. Something that I wasn’t ready for is the period before […]

(Part 1) Cured of BP? Think again champ.

Posted on February 14, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

Right, so I firmly believe that Bipolar Disorder (BP) cannot be cured. Since this assertion is so wildly disputed I’d like to get that straight right out the blocks – if you disagree and aren’t willing to engage in meaningful debate you can leave now.

A typical hypomanic ‘episode’

Posted on February 14, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

It’s likely there will be many more posts about (hypo)manic episodes on here I guess – it’s probably a sign I’m heading that way when I post. It is what it is. I also loath the term ‘episode’ … this isn’t “Pleasantville: A limited series”. Here’s what I remember from recent episodes (some of which […]

It’s bipolar outside!

Posted on February 8, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

Oh! Everyone’s a Meteorologist now with a penchant for psychiatry. Actually, the weather outside is doing weather things as weather things tend to do. You on the other hand are showing your ignorance and apathy for 3% of actual humans, on Earth.

BipolarMe.org

Posted on January 30, 2020July 15, 2021 by James

I’m your average millennial from South Africa. Except I’m sharing this space with the other 3% of the world plugging their way through life with bipolar. Also, HIV positive and (yay!) undetectable.